Updated: Feb 6, 2022
I'm used to waking up in the morning, heading straight to my phone to see what time it is, checking my emails, and scrolling through social media. Not only do I do that, but I also carry my thoughts over from the night before like a marathon. Thinking early about my task for the day, mentally preparing for work too far in advance, and thinking too much about how I'm going to handle situations or circumstances that I haven't experienced yet. Too many thoughts going on so early in the morning, and if I'm still tired and didn't rest well, it's even worse. Then other ideas start swarming in my head. "Did you pray?" "Did you thank God meaningfully for blessing you with the ability to wake up again?" "Did you breath and released all the tension from the day before?" "Did you meditate?" Then another question pops up in my head. " Who do you serve?" This question is the kicker. At this moment, who am I serving? Myself? My negative attitude and thoughts? Who am I casting my worries and anxieties to? I'm trying to control too many things too early in the morning. This makes me feel even more anxious, sluggish, and tense.
But then there are other days when I wake up, and I don't go to my phone first. I actually sit in the bed, and I talk with God. I talk to God about how I'm feeling in the morning. Expressing my vulnerabilities to him, my concerns, my sadness, or even my happiness. I genuinely have a conversation with God, as if he's sitting right there next to me. Sometimes I laugh with him, sometimes I cry, and I thank him most of the time. After my conversation with him, I may read scripture or recite one of my favorite psalms, Psalm 23. It is then that I feel empowered. I feel peace and upliftment. I feel a boost of energy, and my morning feels off to a great start. So who do I serve? I serve God. God didn't give me life again to start a new cycle of rapid thoughts and stress what happened the day before. A day that has now entered the past. God is my strength, my happiness, my life. Who knows me better than I know myself? God! Who knows what I need better than I? God. My Creator, who designed me, knows my flaws, faults, weaknesses, strengths, and skills. So I know that it's him that I need to always go to first, every morning.